In a way

Language is a funny thing. Isn't it funny we try to express our feelings, worries, vulnerabilities, passions...all of these things...through weird sounds we make using our tongues, through vibrations projected through our vocal chords? Through written language, which just seem to be strokes and dashes and squiggles, different symbols? Isn't it funny that these things wont mean anything or mean something completely different from one country to another when you cross the ocean?

 Learning a language means you're also learning how to associate yourself into that culture. Unless you were raised from infancy knowing this language, it shows intention on your behalf that you want to know and learn about something foreign. Through phrases, adages, idioms, slangs, you familiarize yourself with a certain mentality and sense of culture, and this is a language on its own. It's so fascinating to see...I don't want to be jaded in one mindset or culture, ever. I want to be as open and free as I can possibly be, forever.

Purple Rain

I  can't believe you are gone. Such a fucking legend.


이상하게 기억하기도 힘들정도 어렸을때 이 노래를 너무 좋아했고
이 노래가 티비에 나오면 난 앞에 앉아서 춤 추면서 같이 따라 불렀다
지금 들으면 옛날 생각 나서 더 좋은
요즘 어떤 한국 방송에 다시 나오는 이 노래

사랑은 스쳐지나가는
그런 물방울 같은 것을
비가 내리다 그치면
흔적만 내고 말라 사라지는 자국이라고

이해하며 느끼게 되고
단순하고 진부한 비교하는 말 따위는
나이가 들면 더더욱 진실같고 마음에 와닿게 된다는

이밤 왠지 그대가 내 곁에 올것만 같아
그대 떠나버린걸 난 지금 후회 안해요
그저 지난 세월이 내리는 빗물같아요
그렇지만 문득 그대 떠오를 때면
이 마음은 아파올거야
그누구나 세월가면 잊혀지지만
사랑은 창밖에 빗물같아요

이밤 그대 모습이 내 맘에 올것만 같아
그대 말은 안해도 난 지금 알 수 있어요
그저 지난 세월이 내리는 빗물같아요
그렇지만 문득 그대 떠오를 때면
이 마음은 아파올거야
그누구나 세월가면 잊혀지지만
사랑은 창밖에 빗물같아요
사랑은 창밖에 빗물같아요

My first Christmas holiday away from my family, first time in 17 years spending Christmas in Seoul.

november 16, 2016

I think everyone goes through moments of depression.
The crucial part of this is
When you're able to pull yourself out of it
And what you need to pull yourself out of it
And how drastic the measure is
in which you need to pull yourself out of

I like being alone because I process a lot of thoughts,
Read a lot of books,
Learn many things,
And watch a lot of movies
When I'm alone with nobody else to talk to
But it gets me restless
And sometimes I used to think it was good
That it made me a sensitive soul
But I think maybe I shouldn't be alone
And I am a rational person who usually doesn't like to show these things
To people

Maybe it's good I kept this blog.
Hardly anyone reads it
And I can talk about anything I want without feeling obligated to check for comments, tags, likes,
Those things don't matter
Those things shouldn't have ever mattered
It's just a weird time in the world's time,
I hope it's just a phase